LISTEN

SHOW NOTES

• Genesis 25
  • Isaac, Abraham’s son, married Rebekah. Rebekah was barren. God heard Isaac’s prayers and Rebekah became pregnant with twin boys. We see again this theme of a woman’s barrenness and are reminded that children are a gift from God. 
  • God told Rebekah there were two nations in her womb. He made it clear to her “this situation was bigger than you.” Do we look at our kids as being part of a bigger story than just that of our individual family? 
  • There’s a difference between favoritism and connection. It’s ok to have a connection with your kids, acknowledge it, and lean into it (ie: dad played baseball, one child shows an affinity for baseball—naturally they spend special time together). However, it’s important for parents to be wary of a connection turning into a show of favoritism.
• Genesis 27
  • We see Rebekah’s deception and favoritism establishing a behavioral pattern that is evident within this patriarchal family of our faith through the remainder of the book of Genesis. 
• Genesis 37
  • The connections that give you a commonality with one child over another can EASILY create jealousy and competition. There is an enmity between Jacob and Esau. Be aware of how your children are feeling. 
  • We see clear patterns of barrenness, favoritism, and deception within families in the Bible, and this is one of the reasons the Bible is so accurate and trustworthy. It doesn’t shy away from telling you the bad parts. It’s showing us the worst of this family, not just painting a rosy picture of humanity. 
  • How do you break family patterns you don’t want to repeat? You can’t break it if you don’t first acknowledge it. You don’t repent from something you don’t think is wrong.
  • Hurtful patterns must be met head-on. Some things we can flesh out with prayer and Bible study. And some patterns will require the help of a wise counselor—maybe a little, maybe a lot. That’s ok. Don’t be afraid of that. It’s intentional, and important.
  • Be a student of your kids. If you don’t have a natural connection with a child, how are you discovering who they are? There’s a reason quality time is a love language. 
  • Connections are one thing, but favoritism is another. Communication is the burden of the sender, not the receiver. If our children are interpreting the time spent or invest made with a sibling as favoritism, it’s up to us to communicate better and differently with them.

BIG IDEAS

• There are Biblically-established patterns of behavior within families. 
• The Bible also shows the ability of a family’s story to be redeemed.
• Whatever we have to do to eliminate competition between siblings—facilitating our children loving each other, liking each other, and having each other when we, as parents, are gone—is essential work.